i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
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