why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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