Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize