So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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