omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
