Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
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