The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Randomize