When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
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So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
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They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
He? As in you personified your dick?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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