windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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