And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Randomize
