I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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