Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
