Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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