Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
