I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
