we have pet lesbian snakes
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
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