OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
