I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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