Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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