my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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