dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry