Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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