Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize