Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Are we still banned from the library?
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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