I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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