I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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