You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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