ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
