Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize