Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize