even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
