I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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