I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Every concussion has its silver lining
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
