i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Randomize