okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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