do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Randomize
