she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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