So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize