How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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