i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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