real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
