Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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