Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.