I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize