I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
