do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Randomize
