Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
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MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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