She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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