you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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