More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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