Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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